When it Rains it Pours
by DarkTaoAngel
Summary: After a regretful desiction, Horo comes to realize just how much Ren meant to him... only after he'd killed him. Ren x Horo, full summery inside.
1. Snow: Painful Decision

DarkTaoAngel: Well, another fan fiction, and hopefully I will get around to updating soon! I will write more if I get 5 reviews, but I hope I get more than that! Hope you like this one!

Summery: Cocky Tao Ren comes to stay at Funburi, and ends up asking for a battle with none other than that 'baka Ainu'. Filled with strange emotions towards the arrogant Tao, Horo is confused and angry. Unsure of whether he loves him or hates him, Horo makes a horrible decision, one that involves the bloody death of Ren. After it is all over, Horo has a chance to think things through, when he finally realizes the mistake that he had made, and comes to the conclusion that he did indeed love Ren. But now that he is gone, will there be enough at stake for Horo to admit to his past choices, or will he be forced to take his own life as well? Set in Horo's point of view.

I was standing alone in a field, surrounded by nothing but nature. It felt so good, so peaceful and relaxing. I had my eyes closed, but it felt then as though I could see better than I ever had with them open. It felt great to escape, just to get away from it all.

Kororo hovered beside me, she, too, was filled with the joy of communing with nature. I had no idea as to how long I had been out here, for when it was probably hours, it seemed like just a few minutes. Time was passing me by, but I had little or no care for where I was supposed to be, or what I was supposed to be doing. It felt as though the day was going to be one spent outside, enjoyable and somewhat casual, when I was interrupted soon after I was beginning to relax a bit more.

A large, black limousine came driving down the street, replacing the calm tranquility with the sound of a rather noisy car horn. _Please, don't be him,_ I thought to myself, _not today; not now! Please, I ca not handle him today. That is why I am out here, to get away from him! Please, just make the limo pass our street!_ But fate decided to take sides today, and I was left as the unlucky one. And, sure enough, the black limo sped down the street to park just outside of the doors to the Inn, where I was currently staying.

And who should step out of the luxurious car but none other than my worst fear at the time, Tao Ren, wearing his usual I'm-too-good-for-you smirk as he got out and strode over to the front steps of the En Inn. And I could have sworn at the time that I saw him take one last glimpse at me before entering the Inn where, to my most upsetting horror, I heard that he was to be staying for quite some time. With such an extravagant house of his own, why would he ever need to come and stay here? Well, as it turns out, he was coming because of 'family issues', which must have meant more trouble with his father. That also meant that he would be here for quite some time. _Oh, great._

Lately, though I did not want to admit it, I had been feeling differently towards Ren. Arrogant as he may have been towards me, I did not bear a grudge. So, what was it that I was feeling? I felt a bit nervous when I was around him, as though waiting for him to pick out every bad trait of mine and use it against me. But it was not just that, I no longer felt the need to boast and call out rude remarks when he was around, it was as though I could not, or at least I did not want to for fear of embarrassing myself in front of him. _What am I thinking? He's just an arrogant, selfish child, and nothing more. He is a rival to me, and could never be anything even close to a friend… or maybe more._ What was going through my mind at the time, I would never know, but it was as though, over the years with him, I had developed a sort of liking to him. Not just as a friend, but perhaps more. _No, not him! He could never be that to me. He would never like me, and besides, things like this are not supposed to happen! Not to me at least! But, his smile, everything about him, is just perfect. It's as though I'm drawn to him by what I see, but also what I feel. But still, why did it have to be him? _Yes, Fate had plans for us, for me, just not in any way that I had expected.

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Hours after his arrival at the Inn, Ren had become quite comfortable, feeling right at home, making jokes and poking fun at me. I did not want to, but I did not fight back. I didn't have to will to anymore. And I no longer knew if it was because I hated him, loved him, or somewhere in between. I was lost, and that was doing a lot to the way I though about things. Had I been able to, I would have sent him back on his way home right after he arrived at the Inn, but that was not up to me, as I was just a guest there myself.

The day as a whole was still quite nice, though only when I was away from _him_. So it was a great upset to my day when he asked if I wanted to battle, merely to test my bravery, and not to actually battle. And I must have surprised him, judging by the look on his face, when I accepted his challenge. I even surprised myself by that point, but I felt as though there was something to be accomplished from fighting him. It could have been to find out what my true feelings towards him were, and so, to uncover the truth, I arranged the time and place of the fight. And, as I was shocked to hear, he actually agreed with what I said for once. Maybe he knew the truth about what I thought about him, and I knew that if he did, I would have to give him a real fight, just to show him that there was nothing between him and I. But even I knew that I was lying to myself there, because there was something, I just did not know what yet, but I soon would know everything.

I waited in my room the rest of the afternoon, until finally the time of our fight came. And so I left the Inn, not knowing how I, or he, would have changed by the time we got back. My destination was Mata Cemetery, which, for some odd reason, seemed to be just the place that he would choose for a fight, not one that I would want to go to. But at least the weather was good, which would make it easier for me to use my attacks. But I was still worried, for what reason, I was not sure, though there were a lot of things that I was unsure of that day, and I met up with one almost immediately after entering the place of the fight.

Upon arriving I saw him, Ren Tao, standing alone in the middle of the cemetery as though he owned the place (and he might, too). It surprised me that he was early rather than late, but I dared not ask questions. I just wanted to get through this fight in one piece.

Ren noticed me right away, asking why I was so late. I wanted to argue with him, but instead I just said that I was sorry. He knew something was going on with me, but for some reason, he did not ask. He was not acting himself, though neither was I, so this was sure to be an interesting fight.

Taking off his cape, Ren quickly called forth Bason and put together a huge oversoul. I called out Kororo and put her into the snowboard, wasting no time, like Ren, in beginning this fight.

Ren's enlarged oversoul cut right through my ice shield the first time, and so I pumped more furyoku into my oversoul as well. We were pretty evenly matched now, and so I knew this fight would be over soon. But he seemed to be holding back some of his power. Why would Ren ever do such a thing, when he could win if he did not? Whatever his reason was, it was costing him the fight, and quickly I got the upper hand. Though I wanted to hold back somewhat, I did not dare, because I did not want to hear the comments from him in the end. So I fought with all that I had.

At first it was just a game, a mere source of fun and entertainment; but soon it became much more, and I wanted to win more than I ever had in my life. It was a sort of craving, and it had taken over my entire body. I did not care what happened to Ren, but only that I won this fight. My mind was blank, and I could no longer think. I had never felt so empty inside before, but I could not _feel_ anything at the time.

I used my ice to make a jet propulsion, the thrust sending me straight towards Ren, who then went flying because of the force from the attack. I was happy; I had got what I wanted. But I quickly wanted more, not only to win, but also to make Ren regret ever having challenged me to this fight.

Ren was on the ground, cursing me in what I though sounded like Chinese. His right arm was bleeding, but not too bad; though he could hardly send another attack my way. _Perfect._

I attacked him again, and again, just for the thrill of it. I was enjoying myself thoroughly, and I did not care who I was hurting in the process of my 'fun'.

Ren was hurt severely by the time my tenth attack landed. Both of his arms were bleeding, there was a large gash in his side, and a cut on the left of his face make blood trickle down his face and drip to the floor. His long, purple hair hung limply, and his golden eyes had lost their spark. As blood poured out of his body and on to the ground it made a slight splashing noise. Oh, how I loved that sound.

I knew that there was only one attack until Ren was no longer able to withstand the force of the pain. I knew what the price to pay would be. But to murder him would only be a bonus level in my never-ending game. I knew I would regret it later, but for now, my fun was only just beginning.

I looked deep into his eyes one last time and saw one emotion only: fear. He was afraid, afraid of what was to come, afraid of death, afraid of me. He had trusted me, and what had I done to him? He was like a scared little child, so helpless, shaking and writhing in pain.

I watched him quiver at the sight of Kororo, readying my last attack. He looked at me, as though daring me to do it, though not actually thinking that I would. I smirked, making sure that he saw it, and with one last blow, sent a giant icicle right through him. As the ice made contact with his skin, piercing through his chest, I saw a different look in his eyes: a white, death-like look. He was gone, and I was glad. Now I did not have to deal with the feeling I had been having, nor did I have to deal with him any longer.

I could hear his bones crack under the pressure, and I saw the blood flow out of him like a fountain. He doubled over backwards and fell, screaming from all of the pain. But he did not have to suffer for long, for he soon lay still, while blood gushed out of him, staining the ground a dark crimson. The white of the snow on the ground that I myself had put there was now red, flowing over his dead body, burying him.

He was finally dead, and I had smiled the whole time I had watched him fall at my hands. Yes, Fate was cruel to him.

DarkTaoAngel: Yes, I know I could have done better, but this is only the beginning! If you want a happy ending, or a sad one, just let me know, because I can change the plot if needed! And yes, Horo was out of his mind, but let me tell you now, this is a _romance_ story! Oh, by the way, does anyone know the difference between RenHoro and HoroRen?


	2. Rain: Disbelief

It was raining; I could feel wet drops of water fall from the sky, landing on my face with a slight splash. The water seemed to snap me out of my trance, and I finally realized what I had done. I looked over to Ren, seeing his pale skin and helpless look. I walked over to him, reaching down my hand and taking his. I knew right away, even before feeling how cold he was, that he was dead.

I rubbed his hand in my own, trying to warm it. When nothing happened, I began to worry even more. _What have I done? I just killed my best friend, not to mention the person I…_

And then it hit me, hard; I no longer was confused about my feelings for Ren, and I knew what had been true for a long time. I did love him… with all of my heart. The only problem was, he was dead, and I had killed him.

Why had I done such a thing? Could it have been that my confusion had blinded me? There was a very thin line between love and hate for me, and I had been in the middle and slipped to the wrong side of that line. Now I regretted ever coming to Mata Cemetery in the first place.

I began crying immediately without even realizing that I was. My newly shed tears blended in so well with the rain still falling harshly and unforgivingly upon my love's cold, dead body.

I pulled Ren on to my lap, embracing him as though he would come back to life at any given moment. Not even my jacket could protect me from the cold that came off of the body before me. Oh, how I wanted more than anything for him to spring back from his deep sleep and hit me, insult me, do anything that would signify that nothing had happened to him. But no, he remained still, not saying a word. He was so silent; so cold; so dead.

I pulled his hand, still clutched tightly in my own, up to my face. I kissed it lightly, wanting to do the same thing to his lips, but knowing deep in my heart that it would not be right. How I felt was not right. He was a guy, and I was a guy, so it was impossible for us to be in love; to have ever been in love. But then, why did I feel that way about him? I wondered for a moment whether he had loved me or not, but I knew all along that he never had.

I lay down his body gently, tears still streaming from my eyes. I was surprised that he was so cold, but I had piled snow over him after he had died, and that could have made him that much colder. I looked down at him again, and punched a nearby tree in my rage. I was angry at myself for what I had done, angry at him for letting my do it, and angry at his father for sending him to the Inn in the first place. None of this would have happened if Ren had just stayed in China, and that made me even more furious for some reason. I was angry at everyone and everything; I was just angry.

I did not want to leave him there, but I was unsure at the time how my friends –his friends also—would take it. I turned to walk away, looking back at his lone figure one last time. I felt hot tears sting at my eyes and cloud my vision, and I was glad, because then I would not have to see him that way again. It broke my heart.

I still did not know what drove me to do what I had done. I was out of my mind, and just the thought of what I did killed me more inside. _No, _I thought to myself, _I did not kill him; it was not me. Something was controlling me. I can't have done that! I loved him! Why did this have to happen? Why to him and not me? _Of course I loved him, but it took his death for me to realize that fact.

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I arrived at the Inn soon after, going right up to my room. I did not want anyone else to see my tears. I ran up the stairs to the room I was staying in, flinging myself upon my bed and burying my face in my pillow; I did not know what was happening to me, but I felt like crying. I knew crying could not bring him back, but I could not stop. What else was I supposed to do after killing the one person I loved beyond all others?

I heard Yoh and the others leave the house, and I knew it was safe for me to come out of my room. I snuck out through my door, down the hall, and to my destination. I did not even know why I was going there, but something about his room drew me in, and I knew that was where I should go. I wanted to revisit his memory, even if my last memory of him was my worst.

I stepped into the sunlight of his bedroom window, surprised that his room was so bright. It was clean, compact, and very organized. There was only one thing in his room that really interested me. A red photo album lay on a desk by his bed, and as I looked in it, I saw pictures of the whole gang. Some of them were funny, and some of them were more serious. The last page in particular surprised me; at the very back of the album was a picture, larger than the rest of them. It was a picture of me, and right in the corner of it was my name, surrounded by a small, red heart.

At first I was not quite sure what to make of it. Ren never seemed to be the type of person who would _like _hearts, let alone draw them. And why was it around_ my_ name? I did not want to just to conclusions, for I knew that, regardless of what it was, I could have different meanings. We were best friends after all, and it was likely that it did not mean what I thought, and hoped, it did.

There was something else on the same desk, and since I knew I had some time left before everyone else came back, I decided to look at it. It was a book, and not just any book, a book of poetry. _Ren writes poems? _Even I was surprised, because after his dark past and everything, he did not seem like one for anything happy or pretty. Then again, not all poems were happy, and hopefully not all were pretty. But, if I really thought about it, Ren writing poetry made perfect sense. Writing was a great way to express yourself, and everyone knew Ren really needed to do that.

I paged through the book, not expecting the poems to be as good, and well written, as they were. Most of them were based on elements, though not that many were about fire. I would have thought that Ren of all people would be one to write dark, evil poetry, and fire seemed to be the darkest of elements. Most of them were water, though, which was just the opposite of fire. One of the poems really caught my eye, and I could not help but read it.

'_The rain may beat down heavy_

_On broken hearts tossed aside. _

_And every water drop collected_

_Symbolizes another tear cried._

_The storm outside may topple_

_Over every shattered pride,_

_But regardless of whether it's raining or not,_

_The pain can only double inside._

_From the day its heart begins to beat,_

_Into its mind this is bore:_

_One must never settle for less,_

_When one can always get more._

_So whether it's a little,_

_Or al little bit more, _

_As the saying always goes:_

_When it rains it pours.'_

It seemed so rhythmic; so perfect; so Ren. It was beautiful, just as everything else about Ren was beautiful. He was strong, smart, and even caring when he wanted to be. So, why had I not realized my love for him earlier? Perhaps it took what had happened to him for me to finally think things through properly.

I heard footsteps outside, soon followed by the creak of a door being opened slowly. I knew it was Yoh, or maybe one of the other of my friends that was staying at the Inn. I quickly set down the book of poetry exactly where it had been when I had found it and ran across the hall and back into my own room. Once there, I turned the lock so my door was un-openable from the outside.

I would have to tell them all eventually, but I did not want to at the time. I was not ready. I was not even ready to fully tell myself yet, for I still believed that it was not true.


End file.
